"Ministry of Angels…"

Cancer is both a blessing and a curse. I don’t just think that, I know it.  Just three short months after my daughter was born, I was diagnosed with Hodgkin’s Lymphoma. Life went from being perfect, to being flipped upside down in a matter of eleven days. I went from being on top of the world, to not knowing how long my world would last. Just a couple of weeks after my diagnosis, I went shopping in my favorite clothing store, Altar’d State. Walking up and down the aisles, I didn’t see anything that would make me feel better. Then I came across a girl wearing a thick headband in her hair. I asked her if the headband could cover her hair. Without hesitation, she pulled the boho bandeau off and showed me that it did, indeed, cover her entire head. This was exactly what I needed as my hair had started falling out that morning. In that second, I knew God had sent me there for a reason, and the girl wearing the headband was put there as my angel. Read More

"Still My Mommy…"

When people ask me the hardest part about my cancer diagnosis, my response does not include the chemotherapy. It does not even include the grueling surgery and recovery prior to chemo. It also doesn’t include the scary time that my port broke and a part was lodged close to my heart. The worst part of being diagnosed was watching my daughter and husband continue their lives as I was immobilized, lying and sleeping on the couch. I would watch my daughter at the time who was 2 years old, continue to play with her toys, sing and dance, play in the yard, and it absolutely broke my heart that I did not have the energy to go along with her, or be her normal mom with my regular hair. I remember the day I had to shave my head when my hair was falling out. My daughter watched as my husband shaved it. Then it was the new norm for her, it wasn’t scary at all. Read More

"32 Easters…"

The colors of spring danced in the bright, fuchsia azaleas mocking the lingering sadness in my heart. I bent down to tie my running shoes and with a quick skip, I was off for a run. The sun pooled into the lake as the white shells crunched rhythmically beneath my feet. It was near Easter, twenty years ago on a New Orleans levee and a younger ME was putting as much sweat and distance from my sin, when I lost my footing and fell to the ground. I struggled in frustration to get up, as a trail of blood slipped down my chalky knees. Warm air and embarrassment settled around me and on that well worn path, I cried out to God to save me. That day, sin lost its traction to my soul. My life was redeeMEd. I love Easter because of this. Everything about it. Read More

"Anything but beautiful…"

Ten years after beating breast cancer, the doctor said I was cancer free. The worrying finally stopped. That is, until last summer. The lesions quickly spread across my breast, bringing redness and pain. The initial biopsy revealed that I had stage 3 inflammatory breast cancer. It wasn’t even a recurrence of the first cancer. This was a totally new cancer. The surgeon said, in disbelief, “This just doesn’t happen.” I would hear that a lot over the next several months as I began treatment. A genetic test discovered that I had the rare PTEN mutation, which made me susceptible to developing a number of different cancers. The revelation that I had this particular mutation suddenly made everything so much more complicated. I realized that I most likely would have yet another cancer. Being declared NED a second time became much less likely. Read More